In hindsight. Hold your baby.

11/13/2010 05:08:00 AM
I remember the first person who said it.

The first person who said we could spoil our baby by holding her too much.

We were in the hospital. Lila was maybe 24 hours old and her Daddy had yet to put her down. He had been the sole person to bathe her, dress her, change her and swaddled her while I rested and slept.

My O.B. walked in to check on me, looked at Craig who was still holding Lila and immediately said, "You know, we have a saying for what you're doing in Spanish... It basically means you're spoiling her already. It's ok to put her down."

I'll never forget that look in Craig's eyes as he told the doctor, "Yeah... well... whatever... I'll hold this baby for as long as I can."


The doctor meant well.
Relatives meant well.
Friends meant well.

So many told us, "You'll spoil her. Put her down. You don't need to hold her all the time."

Sixteen, almost 17 months later, I say this:

Mommies and new parents: HOLD your babies. Hold them all the time. Hold them as often as you'd like. Hold them, hold them, HOLD THEM.

It really does go by so very quickly.

We were able to hold Lila until she was about 4.5 months old. Then... she was finished. She was done. She didn't want to be cuddled. She wanted to see, to learn, to touch, to feel, to explore. Every now and then she'll be still for a few moments and allow me to hold her, but that's few and far between. I'm so thankful for those early days.

Holding her and cuddling her was one of the smartest parenting decisions we ever made. And we intend to hold Lila's sister just as much.



  1. Beautiful.

    I agree completely.

    Hold them every second you can.

  2. I couldn't agree more. My mom was a babywearer and people were downright mean to her about how she was spoiling me.

    I learned from her. The ladies be gettin' held.

  3. Amen!

    People bickered at us all the time with E. As a newborn (and mainly due to her reflux), she would only sleep if we held her. My husband and I both LOVED it. Everyone told us we were creating a monster. She's 7 months old now and wants nothing to do with us. ;) Those moments when she crawls over to snuggle are the best.

  4. Jocelyn's pediatrician told us the exact same thing. He (and all the nurses) said there's no way we could spoil her!

    And, I love him.

    I wish my little girl was a cuddly baby, but she's just not. Not even when she was tiny. But now she's started to get a little attached to me, which I secretly like :)

  5. I agree! Bryn is two now and she still loves to be held. I don't give a flying fig what anyone thinks! There will come a time when she doesn't want to be held anymore. That makes me sad.

  6. Love sweet. Holding those wee little ones for however long they allow seems like such a special gift!


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