When the tooth fairy doesn't show up. (Lessons in holding your tongue.)

7/01/2018 09:20:00 PM


So the other night, I hear footsteps coming up the stairs and I wake up to the little hallway-sensor lights seeping in through my closed bedroom door.

My seven-year-old, who is still wearing 4T jeans, taps my hand to wake me and says, with a HUGE smile on her face... "I lost another tooth! My tooth came out while I was sleeping! It just came out! No blood! Nothing!"

**Parenting note: We're coming off of her losing the two teeth on either side of her front teeth literally 3 weeks ago when she had her tonsils and adenoids removed. ANOTHER lost tooth? I don't even know how this kid eats.

The tooth fairy has been a frequent visitor to this casa as of late.

"Oh wow, Vivi! Great. Put your tooth over there on the table, then tomorrow we'll put it out for the Tooth Fairy. I think it's already too late for her to show up since it's almost morning."

::

She was totally fine with that answer.

She happily bumped out of our room and I listened to her hop downstairs back to her room.

Back to sleep.

We'll talk about the tooth when it's not 4 am.

::

Fast forward to the next morning. Shock and awe. ANOTHER tooth lost? WHILE she was sleeping? Crazy. We facetimed with Mimi. Vivi put the tooth in a teeny-tiny treasure chest so she wouldn't lose it.

A couple of hours later:

"Mommy? Do you know where my treasure chest is????"

Me: "Um, nope. Your tooth, your responsibility."

(My empathetic parenting skills are strong.)

Vivi has a slight melt-down.

Me: Don't worry, Vivi. The Tooth Fairy knows you lost the tooth. When you find it, just put it under your pillow. But don't worry, she'll totally come tonight no matter what.

**Parenting note: Please remember that I told my anxious child not to worry, the Fairy will "totally come tonight no matter what."

I said, "No matter what."

::

It's bedtime.

She goes to sleep.

::

She wakes up in the morning...

...and...

the Tooth Fairy didn't come.

**Parenting note: Oh man. Insert loud, audible sigh...

She marches upstairs to our room as soon as she wakes up.

I can hear her terrifying little footsteps.

I gasped.

I woke up Craig. "Omg. We forgot."

::

Door barges open with the might of Paul Bunyan in a 42 lb. pound.

"Nothing," she states LOUDLY for the record. "The Tooth Fairy didn't come."

Me: "Oh no! Oh man. I'm sure she'll come tomorrow.

SILENCE.

Vivi: "I wrote her a note."

::

The day moves along, we reassure her again that the Tooth Fairy WILL come tonight...

We do the bedtime routine and seriously, the tooth doesn't even come up. After we're finished I remember: the tooth! So I go back into her room to ask her just where she left the note for the Tooth Fairy...

"It's over there... I don't think I'm going to give it to her, though. It's not very nice."

"Ok," I said. "Then I'll just take it out of your room so she doesn't see it. I know she'll come. No worries. G'night! Love you."

::

I stand in the hallway and I read it.

And I laugh.



The "Mesero" (Waiter) is Vivi.

She's direct.

She appears to have drawn a crying tooth?

She wants to know what.happened.here.

::

The moral of this story:

1.) We all mess up every now and again. It happens.

Grace. Give yourself grace.

Tomorrow is another chance to try again.

2.) Everyone needs a cooling off period.

::

Vivi was SO MAD at the Tooth Fairy. She thought that the Fairy failed her. She wrote her a note. Thought about it. Then decided, "Eh... it doesn't need to be said."

I wish I would have learned that lesson, oh, I don't know -- about 20 years ago. Especially with work email...

We should all be quick to listen. Slow to speak. And slow to become angry.

I'm so proud of her. She's fiery, that Vivi. But maybe she'll learn to tame that fire and use it for good.

::

Life Lesson here: When things don't go the way you expected, be mad. Be angry. Write it out. Feel the feelings.

Then wait.

Your heart will heal, the anger will give way and you'll be open to moving on.

::

It's funny how we learn from them...

::

P.S. We're ready tonight...



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