That sounded... sad and desperate.
Maybe you need some background info.
When my girls grow up and leave the nest and go to college, or I just kick them out, I intend to adopt a labradoodle, name her Clementime, and she will be a therapy dog. Together, we will visit hospitals bringing good cheer, hope and at the very least, dog hugs to people who need them. #lifegoals
So, the labradoodle thing isn't going to happen yet, so this is why I follow this dog on Instagram. Note: I'm very happy with Ferg, my nine-year-old Havanese. I'm moderately happy with Millie, our six-year-old rescue. Kidding. We love Millie. It just took two years.
So, I follow this dog on instagram.
He's @poochofnyc. (Follow him.)
I was originally drawn to him because he totally looks like Bob Ross. (May he rest in peace.) And who didn't love being lured into PBS and watching Bob make his happy trees?
(You see it, right?)
So anywho, THIS picture was on his feed the other day and I've had MORE than a good time captioning it. LOOK AT THAT DOG'S SIDE EYE.
THE SIDE EYE is what kills me.
I've sent the following to my poor baby sister who is currently a busy, sleep-deprived mother of three (including an infant). I'm sure she loves her phone blowing up with the following:
"Girl. I can't even hear that right now. I've got a perm at 4."
"Donald Trump did WHAT? That doesn't even surprise me."
"What do you mean I'm 'overdressed?'"
"I know you didn't just say that my hair is poofy."
"Read my teeny-tiny, pursed dog lips: no."
"Does it look like I care that Beyonce is having twins?"
"That Caesar's dog has no talent."
"My hair color is not brown. It's caramel."
"I'm the global Vice President of Fancy. Didn't you see my cardigan?"
"How you like me now?"
"It's not a necktie, it's an ascot. Pshaw."
"There is no such thing as natural beauty."
"I can't even."
That's what I do.
Want me to add you to my texting list?
I didn't think so.
I'll reserve the additional captions for my baby sister. I'm sure she can't wait for her phone to ding with more.
But if you have one, I'd love to hear it... :)