Then I realize that I'm living with two ridiculously demanding, emotionally unstable and frightfully needy people:
|Yeah. They're not pleased with me, either.|
In the past few weeks we have moved from our home of about 7 years to a new home - a home that we were supposed to move into days after a category 4 hurricane hit our community. We have since unpacked copious boxes of far too much stuff, entirely too many rubbermaid containers and my personal favorite and yours: boundless un-labeled garbage bags full of clothes and other treasures. All the while working full-time.
AND, all the while constantly having constantly hungry children constantly at our heels. (Yes, I used "constantly" thrice times. I can. My blog.)
7:00 a.m: "I'm hungry."
9:00 a.m.: "I"m hungry."
9:30 a.m.: "I'm hungry."
10:15 a.m.: "I'm hungry."
You get the gist.
They're always hungry. My usual response, "No you're not. You're bored."
That response has overtaken my diversion technique. I no longer try to find something else for them to do. "Hey, let's do this puzzle!" I simply tell them, "It's not possible. You ate 17 minutes ago. You cannot possibly need 'cereal and yogurt' right now. Reason points to the fact that you simply can't be hungry.'"
And does my reasoning work?
It just brings about whining.
To which I try to be for real and I bring out the 1-2-3 Magic child-rearing thing. "Lila, that's 1." (That seems to always work for her. She's done. She doesn't want a time out whereby she'll be relegated to some space where I am not and therefore deaf to her demand for more food. Because she's "still hungry.")
Then there's Vivi and the whining.
I could be like, "Vivienne, that's 3 (which is supposed to be immediate removal of activity and immediate time out or time out space... or something) and she's like, "So what? TIME OUTS DON'T BOTHER ME. DID YOU HEAR ME? I said I am HUNGRYYYYYYYYYYYY."
She thinks I am the one who has a listening problem.
So tonight I made dinner.
Post-hurricane we lost everything in our fridge, then we took an evacuation vacation to Ohio for a month, then we got back and moved... so I haven't quite built up the reserve pantry. That said, it's blackbeans, red peppers, corn (onion... shhhh... don't tell the ladies) quesadillas for dinner.
|It's not that bad. I mean, I added CHEESE!|
While I'm making dinner, Lila walks into the kitchen and sees the tortillas on the counter and proceeds to immediately pick up the top two and RUBS THEM ON HER FACE.
I was dumbstruck.
Good mom's response: "I'm sure you're curious as to how the tortillas smell and feel, but next time let's make a different decision and not put them on your face."
My response: "What are you doing? Am I seeing what I'm seeing? Are there tortillas on your face or have I lost it? Lila, it's not ok to put your germs all over the tortillas that other people eat."
She laughs. "Oh. Ok." (She said that with surprise in her voice.)
So I plate the food for the kids.
The kids who are always hungry.
Vivi takes one bite and her entire body flinches and convulses.
"YOU KNOW I DON'T LIKE THESE THINGS! I ONLY LIKE BLACK BEANS."
"Vivi, it's corn. You'll make it."
Full on screaming, "NO, it's TERRIBLE. I TOLD YOU I NEED YOGURT AND CEREAL!!!"
Why do I even try*?
So, as I said earlier, pardon my lack of blogging, I'm living with two demanding, crazy, emotionally unstable and needy people.
[Of course I didn't give her yogurt and cereal. It's us against them. It's cereal and yogurt today and what? Condoms and an American Express tomorrow? I think not. She ate the quesadillas... and picked out the corn.]
I'm having a glass of wine.