Yes, another post about mom-hood.
Mommy Moment: Losing it.

4/09/2010 12:23:00 PM
**Whenever I write a post about Lila and/or parenting I second guess myself and ask, "Really? Do my blog friends want to read another thing about my kid?" Usually I keep the Lila posts to a once-a-week minimum, but I'm compelled to write today. Bear with me.


There are times when being a Mommy makes you want to scream and I'm not sure that everyone talks about this part.

There are literally moments when the whole kit and caboodle seems like more than enough, thank you very much. "No, really. I've had enough. Thanks, though."

I have found that in the past several days I've felt like this more than once.

Endless screaming, dear friends, can and will put you over the edge. Mark my words. Or, it will at least have you ready to find some rope, tie a noose and slip it around your neck.

I think the worst part about the screaming is the helplessness you feel.  For all intents and purposes I should be able to quell the disorder. I should be able to rectify whatever malady my baby is facing, right? I'm the Mom!

Um. Wrong.

Sometimes you just can't fix it.

And, sometimes the only thing you can do is pace and just keep trying new "solutions". For example, sometimes you may find that pushing your kid through your house in her stroller at 1:30 a.m., then 3:30 a.m., then 4:30 a.m. is a resourceful solution since it's the one thing that stops her from crying.

I think it's important during these times that we have someone we can call, or text, or facebook, or tweet to let them know that we're currently at our tipping point. We need someone to confirm to us, "Sista, I've been there. And it's OK that you feel this way. This too shall pass."

Nope, I'm not a bad Mom because at that very moment I would have preferred to run like the WIND from my house and into the nearest bar.

Nope, I'm not a bad Mom because I couldn't fix it.

Nope, I'm not a bad Mom because I was uber-overwhelmed by the situation.

Nope, I'm not a bad Mom because my eyes were filled with tears of frustration.

--

Ain't NOBODY'S baby perfect all the time. We've all been there.

Remember...

You're still a good Mom.
Many a good mommy has walked this path before us and have felt just as overwhelmed at times.

May we treasure the good moments and conveniently forget the trying moments...

This whole baby raising thing ain't easy... but it certainly is worth it.

--

Next up on the Mommy Moment: "Hello baby! Hello guilt!"

9 comments:

  1. "Sista, I've been there. And it's OK that you feel this way. This too shall pass."

    ;)

    I really feel for you. I'm dealing with the same things having two in tow...endless crying from a newborn, coupled with guilt of not being able to spend as much quality time with your toddler = lots of frustration and tears. It DOES help to have supportive friends/family to talk to - especially those who have been there and can relate.

    You are doing a GREAT job!!!

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  2. The reason we have more kids? It gets so much easier (difficult in other ways....) as they get a bit older.

    I keep wondering why on earth I'm starting over AGAIN?!?!

    Just so you know, I've been there PLENTY of times. They do start to become more independent and able to voice their frustrations/hurts, etc. And to me, that becomes "easier". Hang in there friend! I'll be crying right along with you in a few weeks.....

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  3. "Sista, I've been there. And it's OK that you feel this way. This too shall pass."

    I'm sure in these moments it's hard to remember that you are a fantastic Mom. But you are. She knows it, Craig knows it and we know it.

    And if blogging helps you feel better, well then you go right ahead and do it. Don't worry about what we, your readers, need, we'll be fine. I'm pretty sure we'll read every last letter you write about Lila and do whatever we can to help.

    Hug to you.

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  4. I'm sorry. It happens to ALL of us Mommies. Sometimes it feels like pushing the stroller and crying is all you can do. We will thrive and survive! Great job on Mommyhood!

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  5. Oh my. I can physically feel what you're going through right now. It's so so so so freaking hard. I use to have to bounce Athena in my lap on the edge of the bed for what felt like days at a time. I have also done the stroller in the house and the baby carrier on while doing EVERYTHING (including going to the bathroom.)

    They really do get better when they can TELL you when something hurts.

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  6. I couldn't agree more, we all go through it, no one is immune to losing it once in awhile! :-)

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  7. I think we've all been to that ledge and made it back. And it won't be the last time. But as Nadia said, I can't wait for the talking!!! At least for them to be able to TELL US something about what's wrong.

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  8. Since I haven't been there all I can say is that you are a wonderful mommy and I think it is fantastic that you talk about things like this that are frustrating because many people don't want to talk about it because of how they think they may be perceived by others. People keep it in and I think that it is never good to keep these things in that overwhelm you at times. We all must find some form of release when things get stressful, even when it is with your kids. The fact that you even recognize and acknowledge these frustrations means you are doing the right thing with your little girl & the right thing to help yourself mentally! :)

    BIG HUG to you!

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