From my cousin...

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I laughed.
Out loud.
Because I'm a dork.

The best Ferg Friday yet.

Señorita Fergie Lupita was uber-cute this week. Starting off on Sunday's Beach Day.

That's her. Gazing at the huge horse-like dogs in the distance.

Here she is eating sand. Plenty of fiber.

I just think this one's cute.

She was cold at the office the other day. I wrapped her in my sweater.
And she smiled.

I woke her up from a nap to take her picture.
She was thrilled. (Lila has so much to look forward to.)

Then I put my sunglsses on her.

This one actually makes me LAUGH out loud. Repeatedly.

Then she just kept the sunglasses on.

I love Ferg.

She's so cool.

Shoes I really want. But won't buy. But really want. And would like to buy.

Wanted Cairo

$40. (Good price)
Buy them here.

Cynthia Vincent Louella
$400
See here.
I ADORE THESE. They are screaming my name.
(I wonder if I can put these on Lila's baby registry...)

Nine West Rusty
$89.00
Buy here.

Max Studio Cane

$185.00
LOVE these.

It's official.

LOST is the best show on TV.
Yesterday's episode was fantastic.

Aubrey Update

Here's cute little Aubrey, my niece. My goodness, she'll be 2 in May. Can you believe it? Where does the time go?

Apparently she asked my Mom to take her picture with all of her babies... then ran. She's getting over a sinus infection, poor little thing. Perhaps one of the symptoms is sporadic running.

Is it an unspoken competition?

I wonder if some facebook members who have 500+ "friends" get a ribbon and membership into some sort of, "I'm-the-coolest-on-facebook" club.

Top Chef finale tonight!

I really want Carla to win.

I think Hosea is a hoser. (hee hee) (He complains about Stefan far too much.)
And Stefan is too full of himself.

If Fabio were there, I would have preferred him to Carla.

Update: I'm glad that Stefan didn't win. However, I must say - I was taken aback when I saw him get teary-eyed on behalf of Carla?! What?! Is it yet another example of a calloused/annoying/reality-game-show contestant truly being a sensitive little fella? Hmmm....

Product Review:Arm & Hammer Whitening Booster

You know, I'm not convinced.

I use this twice a day (as directed) with my arm & hammer toothpaste and my teeth are not any whiter.
I'm sure the lovely folks at Arm & Hammer are well-intentioned, but this has been a no-go.
I'd skip it.

I don't see any reason...

...why I can't get a star on the Hollywood walk of fame. I mean, Tinkerbell?

I'd also like nominate Ferg.

The 2009 Star Recipients are...

MOTION PICTURES:

Tinkerbell, Tim Burton, Leslie Caron,
Cameron Diaz, Robert Downey, Jr.,
Charles Durning, Ralph Fiennes,
Hugh Jackman, Sir Ben Kingsley and William H. Macy

Pretzel Note: I can get behind everyone of those motion pictures folks. Except Tinkerbell. She's a cartoon. (I love William H. Macy.)

TELEVISION:
Mark Burnett, Felicity Huffman, Chuck Lorre, William Petersen,
Kyra Sedgwick, and John Stamos

Pretzel Note: I'm not sure if the man who gave us Survivor and Are you smarter than a 5th grader? should be applauded. And I'd like confirm that Uncle Jesse does deserve his star.

RECORDING:
Kenny “Baby Face” Edmonds, Dave Koz, The Miracles, Doug Morris,
RUSH, Shakira and The Village People

Pretzel Note: Really? RUSH?

RADIO:
Bill Handel and Harry Shearer

Pretzel Note: Yeah, I don't them either.

Look! We can nominate people. On the Hollywood chamber of commerce page FAQ it states:

Q: Who can do the nominating?
A: Anyone, including a fan, can nominate a celebrity as long as the celebrity or his/her management is in agreement with the nomination. If there is no letter of agreement included from the celebrity or his/her representative, the committee will not accept the application.

Pretzel Note: So, I'm going to assume most of the folks who have stars were nominated by someone in their inner circle. Sad.

Q: What is the cost of a Walk of Fame star ceremony?
A: $25,000 upon selection. The money is used to pay for the creation and installation of the star, as well as maintenance of the Walk of Fame.

Pretzel Note: I guess this means that the celebrity pays for their own star? Isn't that like when Michael Scott presented himself with a, "World's Best Boss" trophy?

Q: Can I nominate someone who doesn’t fit in any of the five categories?
A: No. The categories do not change and the nominee must be or have been active in the field of entertainment.

Pretzel Note: Shoot. Ferg's out.

Learn more here.
Check to see if your favorite star has a star here. (Mickey D I already checked - Dave Letterman is star-less.)

I'm going to go ahead and skip this.

Yep, if you're free in mid-May you can go ahead and take a 3-day cruise with the New Kids on The Block.
Yep.
Learn more here.
Act quickly. Spaces are filling quickly.
I mean, obviously.
--
This quote cracks me up:
"Our manager tells us this is not a cheesy thing, this is not a step back," says McIntyre.
--
Riiiight.

Laugh out loud funny.

T.W.I.T. has her funny pants on yesterday. I laughed out loud with this one.

Fun little Target find.

This is Dwell Studio 5' x 8' rug from Target.

It was only $38.00 on clearence when I bought two of them for our bedroom.
Now they're $20.99.
I'm thinking that for the price, they're fantastic.
I mean, I don't even like BLUE, but it serves its' purpose.
FYI.

Ah yes, welcome home.

My sister and Chloe wanted to make a welcome home cake for my 15-year-old nephew Max who goes to boarding school in SoCal. He's kind of in some trouble with his Mom so this trip home (his "winter break") he has some scheduled chores...


This cracks me up.

I love the irony here: We're happy you're home, so we made you a cake, but you WILL do all of these chores since you're in trouble, but again, welcome home.

I think when you say it with frosting it's easier to swallow. (Get it? Heh, heh.)

Produce Report: She's a papaya for the WHOLE month!

For the entirety of month five, Little Miss Lila Ross is a papaya. I accept this. I love papaya. Yum. And from what I hear, it's quite good for pregnant women.

What's going on with Lila this week? Well, apparently she's an eavesdropper. (I think that out of all of the "droppers" -- name, panty, etc. -- eaves is the best.) She's listening to everything we're saying and is developing an awake/asleep schedule.

Let's get down to biznass:

Q. Is she moving around like crazy?
A. Our little papaya is indeed active. Usually she moves around right before I eat (to tell me it's time to eat) and right after I eat. (I think she's doing a interpretive dance within the womb to express her elation that we have just eaten. I get it. Food is great.)

She also likes to move around at night when I lie down to go to sleep. It's been more fun for C. lately, too. He can actually feel her a bit more.

Q. How am I sleeping?
A. Really great now that I'm not forcing myself to sleep on my flippin' sides. (A big sarcastic THANK YOU you to ALL of the pregnancy books that make you feel like a jerk with a death wish for your unborn child for sleeping on your side after 15 weeks.) My doctor (and from what I hear, everyone else's doctor) agrees that when it's necessary for me to start sleeping on my sides - my body will do it naturally. In other words, it'll no longer be comfortable for me to sleep on my back eventually. So for now? I'm sleeping on my back AND my sides. And I'm happy.

Q. How's the pre-baby reading going?
A. You know, when I first got pregnant I became a member of 4 baby-related websites and started reading approximately six pregnancy books simultaneously. Over the past couple of months I stopped. Comparing yourself to anyone else (especially during pregnancy) is a slippery slope. I've chilled out. I still read, I'm just more discriminating. The likelihood of developing some sort of crazy pregnancy/baby obsession has waned. I'm the type that craves balance after I overdo anything. (As you'll see in the next question.)

Q. If the pregnancy police could haul you in for one offense, what would they charge you with?
A. Eating chocolate Betty Crocker frosting out of the jar.
Q. If I could arrest the pregnancy police for one thing, what would I charge them with?
A. The stupidity of not being able to drink my herbal teas during pregnancy. I miss my a.m. green tea so much. I'm drinking red raspberry leaf tea and also mint tea (de-caff), but I miss my green tea. Blech.

Q. How's your congestion?
A. SO MUCH BETTER! I even quit the crack pipe. (Afrin) It was a tough few days as I was de-toxing, but I'm happy I did it.

Q. Any cravings?
A. You know, not really. I just require dessert after dinner. Easy as that. And, I must eat when I get hungry. Immediately.

Q. How's registering going?
A. SUPER! I made great strides this week. And I bought myself a baby bag as a reward. (See below.)
Final Thought: (Remember when Jerry Springer used to do his, "Final Thought" on all of his terrible shows? He'd allow those people to act horrendously throughout the hour-long crazy-fest, then he'd get all high-and-mighty and explain why they were all trash. What a dork. I wonder what he's up to now. I digress... )

I am in awe that I will be holding our little muffin (or papaya) in my arms in approximately 4 months. I'm floored. I just hope I don't screw her up. I mean, in all honesty - I don't want to mess my spawn up. I know that EVERYONE has "parent' issues. I'm slowly coming to terms that I'll more than likely be an issue for Lila at some point...

To deter this whole "issue" thing I intend to provide boundaries and a ridiculous amount of love and humor. I'm hoping she's accepting.

Thank goodness C. is involved.

End of the Final Thought.
K.

Oscar Recap

Ok, let's be honest - this recap is less about the show and more about the dresses.

About the show:
It’s official. I have a crush on Hugh Jackman.
I am so pleased that Tina Fey was there. Lookin’ all pretty and soundin’ all funny and smart.
And I am elated that Kate Winslet won Best Actress. Yay.

Let's begin about the fashion/red carpet.

NOTE: I refuse to comment on Disney stars. (Not because I’m nice, but because I’m annoyed (like my sister) that they’re even in attendance at the Oscars.)

Amanda Siegfried (from Mama Mia) has a big bow on her dress. That’s not ok.
That's TOTALY a bridesmaid's dress.

Amy Adams looks gorgeous. I love seeing a red-head in red. And, I quite liked her necklace.

Anne Hathaway looked lovely. Boring, yet lovely.
(I still really want to see Rachel Getting Married).
And I love it when she sings...

It's probably me, I just think that Beyonce always looks tacky.

Angelina ALWAYS wears the same thing: a variation of a black dress. I do like her earrings, though. And her hair looks pretty great. (I think she just inspired me to put hot rollers in my hair tomorrow.) How annoyed does she look?
Whatever, sister. You asked for that crazy fame.

Frieda Pinto (the actress from Slumdog Millionaire) looks like she’s mistakenly wearing Helen Mirren’s dress. It’s a great color, but it’s not fun and is far too “mature” (read: old) for her.

Heidi Klum’s dress did nothing for me. I did enjoy her bracelets, though. Blah.

Jessica Biel looked tragic. That bow is frumpy and ill-fitting.
She's super-buff and there she goes rocking a dress that hides bloating. Weird.

I want to be Leslie Mann’s friend. I'd think she's uber-funny. She also looks just fine.

Kate Winslett looks perfect. I love the top, the bottom/sides? Not crazy about them.
Still, I feel she's a woman above women. If Lila wanted to grow up and be like Kate, I'd be ok with that.

I'll say it, Natalie Portman looks like she just competed in some sort of Texas pageant.

Sarah Jessica Parker looked like Galinda. And I won't lie, I'd like to wear that dress.

Taraji P. Henson was my absolute favorite part about Benjamin Button. And she wins, "Best Necklace of the Evening."

Melissa George is wearing the top half of Madonna’s, “Like a Virgin” dress. It’s still tacky. And while I usually love mermaid-style dresses I'm at a loss as to how she actually walked the red carpet. Maybe she used a segway or something.

Marissa Tomei’s dress is a work of origami art. I love, love, love it. She looked amazing. I love the no-jewlery and loose hair. She's my #1 pick.

That's all.

YAY! A new family member!

4 hours old!

My Chicago-based cousin and her hubby just welcomed their first baby into the world.
They were one of those fun couples where he knew the gender and she didn't.
I had predicted it was a girl... and as it turns out, Linden Elyse was indeed a baby girl.
What a precious muffin! Welcome to the world, Linden!

This commercial continues to crack me up.

I love when the M&M gives up and just points to the cashier so as to say, "Shut it." Then drops and scans himself.

See it here.

Random Friday thoughts.

1. I hate the color purple. I really, really do. I would never buy an article of purple clothing and I would return anything that anyone bought for me in purple. (On Lila, purple will be ok...for some reason.)

2. Chris Brown should get into trouble with the law for what he "allegedly" did to Rhianna. I can't abide woman-hitters. Come on.

3. I feel that that Hugh Jackman is the ideal choice to host the Oscars.

MexMo: Gross.

I went to the grocery store last night to buy some items.
Not this item.
EW.

Ferg Friday

Doesn't everyone's dog sit at their dining room table totally unprompted?